My story: How I became an aspiring vegan

Lately I have been asking myself the same question over and over: "Why can't I commit to a vegan diet anymore?"  I keep trying to start fresh with "tomorrow," but I've been failing for over a year now.  

For four solid months during the beginning to middle part of 2009 I was able to abolish all animal products from my eating habits; and I felt and looked the best I ever had in my adult life!  Since June 2009, I’ve gained ten pounds back and can’t seem to consistently stay away from all meat, cheese, and egg products.  Therefore, I wanted to reflect on how this all started and hopefully inspire myself to get back on track once and for all!

The Backstory

Nearly two years ago I woke up uncharacteristically early one morning while spending the night at my best friend's house, and I noticed a book she had laying around called Skinny Bitch.  The book intrigued me enough to pick it up and start reading it.  See, I had been planning my wedding for the last year and it was coming down to the final few months before the "big day" and, like many other brides before me, I wanted to lose as much weight as I could.  Apparently, a wedding is a great motivator.

On its cover, Skinny Bitch claimed to be “a no-nonsense, tough-love guide for savvy girls who want to stop eating crap and start looking fabulous!”  That was me!  I wanted more than a crash diet for the wedding; I wanted a new philosophy on eating, losing weight and keeping it off.  I knew nothing more about Skinny Bitch other than what I read on the front and back covers and in the introduction--which I found out later were both very vague descriptions of the content within the book.   

So, as I delved into Chapter 1, I learned that the authors, Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin, first wanted their readers to give up smoking and drinking beer, liquor, soda, and coffee.  I smiled as I whipped through this chapter and thought to myself that I wasn’t as bad off as I had thought since I didn’t smoke or drink coffee.  I didn’t consume that much soda either and I knew I could give it up easily.  I liked the idea of abolishing my social drinking habit and instead only drinking red wine in moderation, as suggested. 

Don’t take medicine.  Check.  Even as a kid, I would hide Children’s Tylenol tablets under my mattress and spit out the liquid stuff in the bathtub.  Don’t eat simple carbohydrates such as white flour, pasta, rice, and sugar.  Okay.  I had already started incorporating whole wheat flour and pasta, and brown rice into my diet.  I knew I consumed too much sugar so I was happy to learn about alternatives to traditional white, granulated sugar, such as agave nectar and evaporated cane juice. 

After Chapters 2 and 3 came to an end, I was feeling like Rory and Kim could tell me nothing that would surprise me.  Then Chapter 4, titled The Dead, Rotting, Decomposing Flesh Diet, started.  Crap.  I was a meat-eater; not necessarily because I liked meat, but because I thought I had to be.  I had grown up with meat as the centerpiece to every meal, like many Americans.  Without having done much research on the topic, I was under the impression that meat was essential to a healthy diet.  I knew it would be difficult to make the transition from meat-eater to plant-eater only, but after reading about the hormones and other crap fed to animals as well as the lightly-regulated slaughter practices, I felt confident I could quit meat if I put my head to it.

Chapter 5:  No milk.  No cheese.  No eggs.  NO ICE CREAM.  Even though all the information made sense, ice cream was the breaking point for me.  There was no way I could imagine never indulging in another DQ Blizzard or bowl of ice cream from the freezer at home! 

But I read on anyway, all the way to Chapter 13 and beyond.  I finished the book in several hours.  After I finished, my mind was overwhelmed.  Even though the authors suggested eliminating animal products and other chemicals from one’s diet one-at-a-time, I thought it all sounded impossible.  I remember venting to my friend about how crazy it all sounded.  Rory and Kim were basically telling me that I had to completely alter the way I had learned to think about food from the very beginning of my life in order to be healthy and thin.  I wasn’t going to do it.  I couldn’t do it … could I? 

However, that day was the last day I ate any animal products for the following four months.  Being vegan came really easy to me once I got all the proper groceries (very hard to do in the small West Central Illinois town I live in).  The hardest part for me was feeling like I was a pain-in-the-butt around other, non-vegan people.  My husband didn’t buy into the vegan diet, so he would sometimes criticize me for having to order a pizza with no cheese on half of it, for example.  Sometimes it was tricky to eat out with family and friends because some restaurants don’t have many options that don’t involve meat and/or cheese (Applebee’s is one of those restaurants). 

My wedding day came and I had lost the weight I wanted to lose and my skin looked great (another issue I have struggled with all my life).  I was sleeping well and had a lot of energy.  It really was the best day of my life.  But, I guess once the motivation to look great at my wedding wore off, I just slowly slipped back into the lifestyle where I didn’t have to make a conscious effort to stay away from all the horrible foods that are easily within reach. 

Now everyday is like a struggle for me.  I know what I want to do and what I want to be, but I haven’t been strong enough to make it happen.  I’ve just been giving in for convenience and for satisfying a “craving.”

So here I go again … vegan diet starting today!  If anyone else has a similar story to share, I’d be happy to hear I’m not the only one who isn’t completely faithful to the vegan diet.  Oh, and I suggest to everyone:  Read Skinny Bitch.  Even if you have no intention of becoming vegetarian or vegan, the book does a good job of educating its readers on what we are putting into our bodies.

Now, for those of you who are in the path of the severe winter storm that is supposedly coming our way, be safe and stay warm!  Check back for more recipes and updates!